


Every Blessing

by carolinecrane



Category: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-06
Updated: 2012-05-06
Packaged: 2017-11-04 22:47:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/399042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carolinecrane/pseuds/carolinecrane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Make-up sex.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Every Blessing

He's still mad. It's easy to see from the set of his shoulders and the determined look on his face as soon as he sees Greg walking toward him. And maybe part of it is the case that's kept him and Catherine guessing for the past couple days, but Greg knows him well enough to see without asking that it's more than just work stressing him out.

Greg falls into step with him anyway, because he's never been very good at taking a hint. And anyway, this has stretched out long enough, so he's going to do something about it whether Nick likes it or not. "Hey. Tough case?"

Nick glances to his right long enough to raise an eyebrow at Greg, an expression Greg recognizes as Nick's patented 'don't fuck with me' look. It's supposed to be intimidating, but mostly it just makes him look kind of cute. "You could say that."

It's not much, but it's more than he's gotten during their last two shifts, so Greg takes it as a sign that things are starting to thaw out between them. "Anything you want to talk about?"

"Not really." 

"Okay." A long pause, and Greg's not nervous, but he's weighing his words carefully because he doesn't really want to make things worse than they already are. He knows Nick and Catherine just spent two days solving what turned out to be a suicide, and he knows how hard Nick takes those kinds of cases. So he's pretty sure he's treading thin ice here, but he's selfish enough to do it anyway. "So do you want to…not talk about it?"

Nick sighs, and it's not really the answer Greg was going for, but then he stops walking and studies Greg for a moment before he nods once. "Give me five minutes."

And it turns out that five minutes is a lot longer when he's standing around the lab waiting for Nick to do whatever it is he's doing, but finally the other man rematerializes, catching Greg's eye before he heads for the exit. Greg follows, because that's what he does, at least when it comes to Nick. He doesn't have any problems with that at all, because he knows Nick and he knows what Nick needs, and he likes being the one to give it.

They're in the parking lot before either of them says anything else, and Greg stops next to Nick's truck and catches the other man's arm just before he climbs in. "Where to?"

"Get in," Nick says, and that's different, because they don't usually leave a car at work, but Greg's not going to argue. Arguing is what got him into this mess in the first place, and even though he's not really sorry for what he said, he wishes he'd found a better way to say it. At the time he hadn't been thinking that hard about the words coming out of his mouth – he never does when he's sure he's right – but now he's not sure being right is worth it.

He wishes he could think of the right thing to say; words aren't something he usually has a problem with, but when it comes to stuff like this he's got a bad habit of making things worse. And he just wants…he wants Nick not to be mad at him anymore, but he doesn't know how to say it without sounding pathetic. He's still working hard to come up with something that doesn't sound totally lame when they pull up in Nick's driveway, and when the engine shuts off the silence in the truck is almost stifling.

"So are you still mad?" he says before he can stop himself. It's the dumbest thing he could say, because he knows Nick's still mad. He doesn't even have to answer – Greg can just watch his jaw clench and know it's true.

"I'm not mad."

_Yeah, right,_ he doesn't say, because he knows it will just make Nick even more angry. Instead he tries out a nervous grin and does what he does best – he makes a joke out of it. "So does that mean no make-up sex?"

He's not a hundred percent sure it's the right thing to say – okay, he's not sure at all, and part of him expects Nick to order him out of the truck and let him walk back to the lab to get his own car. So when Nick shakes his head and lets out a little laugh Greg's relieved enough to smile for real. "You're crazy, you know that?"

"I get that a lot," Greg answers sincerely, and when Nick grins at him his heart lodges right in his throat. And he knew he had it bad before all this started, but he's just starting to realize exactly how far gone he is. He's spent the past two days pretending nothing's wrong, but it's tiring and he's not sure how people do it all the time. He has no idea how Nick does it, and he's seen the toll it takes on the other man. "Listen, Nick…"

"I mean it, I'm not," Nick interrupts. For a second he just looks at Greg, then he pulls the keys out of the ignition and swings the driver's side door open. Greg takes that as a cue to follow, leaning in close enough to breathe in the scent of Nick's cologne when he stops to unlock the door. And he doesn't really care if he's being obvious, because it's been two days and as far as Greg's concerned, that's way too long.

He spent the first day telling himself that Nick was being unreasonable. He overreacted to an honest mistake, and when Greg tried to call him on it he turned it into a shouting match. Greg knows Nick's a private person and he tries to respect that, but he's never dated anyone like Nick before, and sometimes it gets a little frustrating to remember all the rules. Most of the time he doesn't really mind – it's like a game, seeing how far he can push Nick out of his comfort zone – but there are times when he wonders why they're bothering. 

He spent the second day worrying, talking too much about nothing in an effort to pretend that nothing was wrong, that everything was okay and he wasn't terrified that he'd ruined things between them. He's spent the past two days asking himself what exactly they're doing, and even though he still hasn't come up with an answer, he knows he's not willing to give it up. So he follows Nick into the dark house even though he doesn't know if they're about to break up or if there really is make-up sex in his future – he's hoping for the latter, of course, but he spends a lot of time guessing when it comes to Nick.

When the door's closed and locked behind them Nick drops his keys in the usual spot, then shrugs out of his jacket and lets that drop too. It's quiet inside, even more quiet than it was in the truck, because at least then there was some traffic in the background. The silence makes Greg uneasy, and he opens his mouth to say something just to fill up the quiet, even if all he can come up with is a dumb joke about how the place hasn't changed much in the past two days. 

Before he has a chance to say anything Nick's right in front of him, way past invading Greg's personal space as hands slide across his shoulders to push his jacket off. "Stay awhile," Nick says, smiling that smile that makes Greg's toes curl. It looks even better in the filtered early morning light, and Greg's stomach does a weird little tap dance as he lets Nick push his jacket off. 

He stops himself from saying something stupid like 'as long as you want', leaning in for a kiss just to give his mouth something to do. He presses his mouth to Nick's and parts his lips, and that's an invitation that doesn't need any words. Or maybe it's plain old surrender, but he doesn't really care because Nick's hands are on his skin now, up under his shirt and tracing hard lines on his stomach. 

This isn't the longest they've gone without sex since they started sleeping together – there have been a few really intense cases in the past couple months, like that time Warrick fucked up his search warrant, or the serial killing photographer who took a shine to Catherine. This is the first time he hasn't been sure there would be a next time, though, and he's glad Nick's still kissing him so he won't hear the fractured sob of pure relief that Greg doesn't quite manage to swallow.

Only he might have felt it, because he pulls back to look at Greg, eyes hard and searching for a second before he leans in again, pressing soft kisses this time to the corners of Greg's mouth. And they're still standing right inside the front door, which doesn't really bother Greg, but he knows where they'd be a lot more comfortable. 

"As much as I like your living room, the view in the bedroom's a lot better."

He feels Nick's laugh before he hears it, and when Nick pulls back to grin at him his knees tremble. "I like this view just fine," he says, but he hooks his thumbs in the front of Greg's jeans and starts backing toward the bedroom anyway.

"That was pretty corny."

"Maybe you're rubbing off on me."

Greg opens his mouth to say something about where exactly he's been rubbing, but he thinks better of it and switches tactics. "Nice try. You were like this before I started rubbing anything. Besides, my jokes are funny."

"You keep telling yourself that, G." Nick smiles again, but it's more affectionate than anything, and when he reaches for the hem of Greg's shirt Greg decides to let the subject drop. There's no grace involved in getting them both out of their clothes, and by the time they hit the mattress in a tangle of limbs Greg's not sure how much longer he can last. And it's only been two days, so he shouldn't be this needy, but it's Nick and he doesn't mind admitting that he was afraid this would never happen again.

He was almost sure the last time he left Nick's house that he'd screwed up big, bigger than he could fix. Nick says he's not mad, but Greg's still not sure he believes that, and it translates into kisses that are a little more needy than usual. His hands clutch a little harder than they need to at Nick's shoulders, pulling him close as that mouth sucks at the warm skin at the crook of his neck. And he doesn't care if Nick marks him – he wants it, wants something he can look at when he wakes up so he'll know this wasn't a dream.

A steady stream of words punctuate every touch, and Greg recognizes the sound of his own voice but he's powerless to stop it. The words come even faster when Nick's fingers press inside him, Nick's mouth on his chest now and Greg's pretty sure he's saying things he'll regret later. For now, though, it doesn't matter, because Nick's not stopping and that's all he cares about. In fact, Greg's litany seems to make him move even faster, thrusting more urgently against Greg until suddenly he's gone, pulling away and leaving Greg cold and empty and fighting the urge to reach out.

Endless seconds later he's back, his mouth pressing against Greg's for a hard, urgent kiss that lets Greg know that in this, at least, he's not alone. Nick wants him, and that's something. It's not everything, but he's pretty sure he can wait for the rest. He's going to have to, because he's seen what happens when he pushes too hard, and the worst part is that he didn't know he was doing it until it was already too late to take it back.

_I'm sorry,_ he murmurs against Nick's mouth, the sound swallowed by the kiss as Nick's hand slides between them. He means something closer to 'don't leave me', but he's never been that far gone, and he doesn't plan to say anything that will give Nick an excuse to change his mind. His voice trails off with a low moan when a hand closes around him, stroking hard, and he knows Nick's not in the mood to make it last. That's just fine with him, because this isn't about stamina or spending hours building up to some mythical, perfect moment. He wants Nick to fuck him hard, wants him to hurry up and do it already, and he thinks he might even say it in the moments before Nick's grip tightens and he comes with a sharp, surprised gasp.

When he manages to open his eyes Nick's running a hand over his own cock, slick with Greg's come and he shudders at the sight. He turns over before Nick can even ask, pushing his knees as far apart as he can and fisting the sheets in his hands when Nick presses inside him. Two days – it isn't even that long, but it feels like an eternity, and when he pushes back to force Nick all the way inside Nick's grunt lets him know it's been too long for both of them.

That makes him feel a little better, but it doesn't calm him down any, and he thrusts back with each stroke to pull Nick as far inside him as he can get. Strong hands grip his hips, big and rough and pressing hard, and when Greg shifts just a little Nick's cock presses up against that spot that sets off white sparks behind his eyes. He clenches instinctively, and Nick groans and does it again, over and over until they're both breathless and slick with sweat and finally Nick thrusts one last time and lets go.

He feels Nick slip out of him when he collapses onto the mattress, and he's not planning to move any time soon so if Nick wants to pick another fight he's just going to have to do it alone. Greg smiles weakly at the thought, too exhausted even to laugh at his own bad joke. He feels the mattress shift as Nick forces himself up to peel the condom off, then he hears the water running in the bathroom and for a second he thinks that maybe he should get up and take a shower. If he doesn't he's going to wake up feeling sticky and disgusting, but it's a sacrifice he's willing to make if it means he doesn't have to move.

When the mattress dips again he thinks about rolling over, but when Nick's chest presses against his back he decides against it. " I wasn't mad at you. I should have said something yesterday, but this case…" Nick trails off with a sigh, his voice close to Greg's ear and his fingers tracing the scars at the top of Greg's back. "I'm not scared to tell my parents about us." 

The words are low enough that for a second Greg's not sure he actually heard them, but when he realizes what Nick's saying he forgets all about being tired. He turns until they're face to face, Nick's chest pressed against his side and his palm flat against Greg's chest. Then Nick grins, sheepish and a little…shy is the only word Greg can come up with. "It's just not the kind of thing we usually talk about in my family."

And he should have thought of this before – he doesn't know a lot about Nick's family, but he's heard enough to know they're not exactly big on communication. They love each other, sure, but when it comes to talking about stuff like this…they just don't. Greg's own family couldn't be more opposite, and that makes it easy to forget where Nick's coming from sometimes. But there are other times when Greg's not sure why he's always the one who has to be careful. 

"Maybe I shouldn't have answered your phone. I mean I didn't know it was going to be your mom, but I shouldn't have done it anyway."

Nick's shaking his head before Greg even finishes talking, and Greg decides that has to be a good sign. "That's not the point."

"So what is the point?"

"They don't want to hear this stuff about me," Nick says, and Greg instantly feels guilty because he has no idea how hard it must be to live with that knowledge. His own mother asks more questions than even he usually wants to answer, and for a long time Greg just assumed everyone's parents were the same way. "We just don't talk about it, and that way they can pretend I'm going to settle down someday and have a dozen kids."

"And ruin my girlish figure?" It's the worst thing he can say, so he's not surprised to hear the words come out of his mouth. He expects Nick to pull away, to get defensive all over again and maybe accuse Greg of never being serious. He can still recite the last argument from memory so he doesn't need an instant replay, but instead of pulling away Nick just laughs mirthlessly and rolls onto his back. 

"I can see me trying to explain that one to my mom." For awhile he stares up at the ceiling without saying anything else, and Greg's starting to worry that maybe he's trying to think of a way to tell Greg it's not going to work out when Nick finally pushes himself back up on one elbow. "She knew who you were before I told her."

It takes Greg a second to figure out what Nick means. Even when it does sink in he doesn't really get it, because two days ago they were screaming at each other about whether or not Nick was going to spend the rest of his life in the closet, and now he's claiming that his parents already know who Greg is. He's pretty sure he should say something profound here, but all he can come up with is a confused 'what?'

"They don't talk about it, but that doesn't mean they don't know. I think they just keep hoping I'll grow out of it."

"So they're still holding out for you to wake up straight?"

Nick laughs at that, but the sound's a little strangled and Greg instinctively presses closer. He wishes he hadn't said anything at all – wishes he'd just let the damn machine pick up when Nick's mom called, because he wants to know where he stands with Nick, but not if it's going to make Nick this unhappy. 

"It doesn't matter," he lies, fingers pressing firm against Nick's chest as though he can make it true if he just wishes it hard enough. "Forget I said anything."

Fingers close over his and he looks up to find Nick watching him, mouth set in a determined line and just for a second Greg's scared he said exactly the wrong thing. Then Nick leans forward and presses their lips together, hard and insistent and when he finally pulls away Greg's flat against the mattress again. 

"It matters," Nick says, and there's no point in arguing because they both know it's true. He's not sure where exactly they go from here, but he's pretty sure wherever it is, they'll get there together, and that's enough for him.


End file.
